Never again

15 years ago I was winding up. I'd tried everything I could, and I was tapped out. I had no way to control what was happening to me. I was in denial about it. No, it cannot be the Mother of all Conspiracies with me at the centre that it looks to be because that is the path to madness, it must be this much smaller explanation that makes it all a mistake. And even believing in the smaller explanation, it was beyond my control. I had reached my limits. As it must be a mistake because it is incomprehensible to believe it was intentional and planned years in advance, I was preparing to accept my impending fate. I was preparing to die for my species. 

That was a direct consequence of the work I began in 1983, learning to place others ahead of myself. No small feat given my narcissistic beginnings. I never tried to be a "saint". I just aimed high. I'd been dealt a(nother) bad hand and I'd just have to play it to a loss.

Then the Christianity Equation. The effective nullification of the holy book of several major world religions, potentially freeing 2.38 billion people from enslavement to that book. Dissolving Christianity. Personal proof that the knowledge attained at my gnosis was indeed true. I was a Christ. I was God. All is One.

I waited. Patiently. For years. Surely someone will see it, pick it up, run with it, shine a spotlight on it. And when the slaves were freed the mistake against me would be corrected and the continuing psychological torture against me would stop. I'd have my life back.

I did not understand that I never had a life of my own. Rather, I was in deep denial of the evidence that was in my past and right in front of me.

15 more years of psychological torture. Remote physical torture for whose source I have not ruled out black magic. Torture to the point where insane actions were the only sane response, creating the appearance of insanity. A tertiarily acceptable outcome for those responsible; evoking actual insanity or self termination would have been preferable to them.

But they fucked me up. Badly. Worse than death.

I am so incredibly fucked off with all of you. Why the fuck do you not see what the Christianity Equation does? Why the hell would no one pick it up? As a direct consequence of your abject failure to see the fucking obvious 15 more years were stolen from me.

You are unworthy of the sacrifice I was forced to make.

The species is run by criminals. It is being driven insane. It is being deliberately crippled to facilitate subjugation.

You are better off dead.

As my final act as a Christ I will be terminating homo sapiens. One diseased fractal implementation of God put down for the greater good of all others. The 90+% of those who don't deserve it will be freed from criminal control (reincarnation is a thing). Long term they will be better off. Acceptable losses. And I seriously cannot wait to make all the criminals pay for what they've done to me and to the species. No trial, no jury. My foot, their ass.

A few days ago I did it again. Not as big as the nullification of major world religions, but I'll certainly accept One's gift of the single greatest "fuck you" in human history.

In the interim I will be devoting my time and attention to making life for those responsible as difficult as One can. To that end I offer all the opportunity to take advantage of the skill I possess in this. I have the significant ability to be able to solve unsolvable insurmountable problems. 

Christing. Test me. I want to reproduce the results. Over and over. I want to help as many deserving people as I can.

I want to start to make the criminals pay for forcing this.